Friday, October 19, 2012

One Mean Mama


I must confess that I was not the sweet mom that every kid hopes for.  I promise you I was never mistaken for June Cleaver or Donna Reed.  I held my kids accountable for their behavior and let them know when I disapproved.  Here are some things they said about me.


When my daughter's friend told her that his mom had found marijuana in his room and had flushed it down the toilet so his dad wouldn't find out, my daughter replied, "My mom would have flushed your face down after it."










My oldest son--5th grade at the time--sat at the lunch table and suddenly noticed that he was being watched by the teacher on duty.  He was a kid who always followed the rules, but became nervous under the teacher's watchful eye.  Finally the teacher walked over to him and said, "Why are you such a good kid?"  
My son replied, "Sir?"
 "Why don't you act like these other kids?"
"Well, Mr. Pipkin, I just enjoy living."
"You enjoy living?"
"If I acted like these other kids, my mama would kill me and I just enjoy living too much to act that way."



Frustrated with a student's performance, the teacher told him, "I wish you would just do your work.  I have to call your mother up her and tell her you're failing.  It's embarrassing when she's crying in the hallway."
My son spoke up and said, "If you called my mother up here and told her I was failing, she wouldn't be the one crying in the hallway."






When the same son was in high school, he was complaining about me to a friend and the teacher overheard it.
"Now Darrell, I met your mother and she is a very nice lady."
"Well, let's put it this way.  She got kicked out of the Marines for unnecessary roughness."

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